Chewborski
How many Borski’s bonefish sliders can you make from a wookie?
(Something fun from Tail #10 in 2013)
While fishing certain conversations arise and are occasionally worthy of further exploration & discussion. The last one that lingered and still does was the “Guess this movie quote” conversation which was accompanied by about three weeks of impersonations both good & bad. Most recently, someone blurted out “I need a wookie, do you know how many Borski bonefish sliders I could make from Chewbacca.” Being a very methodical & analytical bunch, we have been figuring it it out. It’s all based on surface area. If we apply basic formulas of geometry to a few assumptions based on standardized data we can probably get really close.
Hopefully George Lucas doesn’t sue us for this but here goes:
Our assumptions:
1. Borski Bonefish Slider requires about a 1×1 inch square (2.54 x 2.54 cm) of craft fur
2. We calculate total body surface area based on standard measurements, body mass index charts & health insurance data.
3. From the total body surface area we can easily calculate the square footage of wookie fur available for bonefish sliders
4. We will exclude the pelvis as no one really wants a slider made from wookie crotch. Same goes for the armpits.
Chewbacca’s dimensions:
Head circumference – 28 inches (71 cm)
Shoulders – 62 inches (157 cm)
Biceps – 26 inches (66 cm)
Antecubital – 19 inches (48 cm)
Chest – 54 inches (137 cm)
Waist – 40 inches (101 cm)
Thighs – 45 inches (114 cm)
Calves – 27 inches (68 cm)
Using a simplified model for purposes of our calculations, the mighty rookie is basically a sphere, a rectangle, and four cylinders.
Area of a sphere = 4 pi r2 4 x 3.14 x 4.5 2 (20.25) = 254 square inches
Surface Area of a Rectangular Prism = 2LW + 2LH + 2WH Length = 40, width 20, Height 6 2(40)(20) = 1600 2(40)(6) = 480 2 (20)(40) = 1600 480 + 1600 + 240 = 3680 Square inches
Surface Area of a Cylinder = 2 pi r 2 + 2 pi r h 2 x 3.14 x 6 2 (36) x 4 = 904 square inches We calculated the following Total surface area Head = 254 square inches Torso = 3,680 square inches Limbs = 904 square inches
TOTAL SURFACE AREA = 4,838 square inches
The mighty wookie would yield at least 4,838 square inches of usable fur. This is an estimation and probably on the low side. We tried to simplify the numbers as much as possible so we used a 1 inch x 1 inch square which is probably overly generous and more than enough for a slider. So the answer to the question “How many bonefish sliders could you make out of Chewbacca” is a minimum of 4,838. Almost 5,000 Borski Bonefish Sliders, which would last most diehard bonefish anglers 15-20 years.
